Uncle (I don’t know much) …

I really don’t know much.

I like to ponder and dissect and share what I glean from that exploration.

But I still don’t “know” much. Continue reading

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Sometimes it Hurts

I don’t have to tell you that sometimes it hurts. You know that.

But I want to tell you. Because it’s easy to forget that everyone struggles. It’s easy to take it personally when things fall apart. It’s easy to surmise that we are each so uniquely flawed and alone in our doubts, insecurities and suffering.

I wonder how we make this mistake, allow this delusion to disguise itself as realty—that somehow others have it easier, are loved more, feel better more often. It’s really a crock of shit. Continue reading

Divorce, Shame and What Century Are We In?

I have these bouts of feeling back in my skin. Thinking I’ve found my new normal and having regained my confidence, I put myself out there in one way or another — professionally, socially, romantically. Before long, I find myself cowering in my cave, wanting to shelter myself from the inevitable slings and arrows of real life.

I’m in the cave stage at the moment. Continue reading

Death, Divorce and “The War of Art” …

It’s been over five years now since my husband and I split up.

Looking back, what fascinates me most is how I could have possibly sunk so low, how my identity and sanity could have been so rattled by the unilateral move of another human being. It’s not that I don’t understand intellectually—my family is everything to me. But, how could I have forgotten the inevitability of loss and suffering in some form? How could I have deemed myself immune from having my reality shattered in one way or another? Continue reading

Adventures in Anonymous (and Non-Anonymous) Blogging

I started this blog with the intention of writing about my circumstances at that time, which entailed sharing a house with my estranged husband (and our two kids). I kept myself anonymous so I could go to town and share all of the nitty gritty, heart-breaking and hilarious details. Continue reading

Braving Christmas Alone…

For the first time in my life, I am fine with being single. I’ve enjoyed the lack of drama and the ability to spend my free time as I wish, shave when I feel like it (and not when I don’t) and just run my own show.

But, tonight, I caved. I cried. And I realized that, while I don’t miss my ex anymore, I do miss having my family together for the holidays. Continue reading

Finding Your Life Purpose … Again!

The problem with being a grown up (and by “grown up,” I kind of mean 40 and up though it can apply to younger folks), is that you’ve lived long enough to know that nothing is the “be all and end all.” If you’re anything like me, you’ve gone through many incarnations and gained and lost many attachments. Goals were either met and replaced by new ones or went unmet and were written off as “wrong fits” in retrospect.

Thus, it can be difficult to believe in or hone in on a single life purpose.

And this is where I have found myself flummoxed. Continue reading

Middle School, Oh how I Hate Thee…

Why am I, a 40 something year old, complaining about middle school? Because experiencing it as a parent of middle schoolers is ALMOST worse than having experienced it as a student myself.

Gee, I wonder why the following strategy is not working – Continue reading

I, Cliché…

“Many people die at 25 and aren’t buried until they’re 75.” -Benjamin Franklin

I saw this quote last night and it hit a nerve. Continue reading